Tuesday, December 27, 2005

What I Would Rather Be Doing

Its Tuesday December 27th and I'm trying very had to complete the one big peice of work that I have to do but its just not getting done. I've been sitting at my desk since 9:15 and since that time here is what I have done:
  • had a cup of coffee - only one so far which is far short of my usual 4 per day.
  • sorted mail because there's no one else here to do it.
  • had lunch
  • researched getting a cable internet connection for my mom
  • bought stock in a company - This just proves how bored I am!!!!
  • surfed mySpace
  • bought a Jack Johnson album on iTunes

The Jack John album is what has sparked this entry. What would i rather be doing right now than sitting here at my desk? Well there's a lot that I'd rather be doing but listening to these two albums has encouraged my to want to crack open a Corona while sitting on a beach.

Or what I could do is learn how to surf. That could be interesting especially when you consider the one thing that i can't do SO well is swim. But surfing would be pretty cool. It looks like a fun thing to do that also requires balance, yet another thing that I can't do. I'm not very well balanced so standing on the surfboard would be pretty difficult.

These are things that I might have to learn to do as i reach old age. Shit I'm going to be 30 in 2 months! I'm looking forward to this year so adding surfing to the mix could be a nice addition because its going to be a very health conscious year when you consider I plan on doing the Ride for the Roses (depending on where in the Northeast it comes to) which is 100 miles in 1 day and the NYC Marathon on November 5th.

Ok well that's all I've got for now. Maybe I'll throw on some Lyle Lovett and dream about being a horse wrangler or a cattle driver.

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Mastercard Blow Job Commericial

The banned mastercard blowjob commerical is now posted along the right hand side along with the other links. Enjoy.

Matt Foley - Motivational Speaker

"I live in a van down by the river!"

Who doesn't love the Chris Farley skit when he's the motivational speaker Matt Foley. Farley is fucking huge in this skit which is probably like a week before he overdosed. You gotta love this skit though, especially because David Spade can't keep a straight face half the time.


Mitch Fatel

Last night, Jenn and Michael introduced us to a new comedian named Mitch Fatel. Ok maybe he's not "quite new" but he was new to us. Here's a couple of links to listen to his work...



Shake That Ass Girl!

Ok the ass cheeks on these girls are supposed to be shaking but right now i'm not seeing any jiggle in that wiggle. It is disappointing because my loyal reader would love to see the butt action.

Let me know if its working for you.

Darren Needs a Beer

Its been 14 hours since the last yummy goodness of beer and my liver is calling for one. QUICKLY! Now the decision must be made as to when, where, which type and how many to drink. I have a conference call in 20 minutes which will last 30 minutes which means I'm out the door by 2:45 and in a bar by 3. From there it will be a minimum of 4 beers then off to finish my christmas shopping. Then I head back to Hoboken to finish what remains of the 12 pack.

Monday, December 12, 2005

Qualified, bitches!

If you're having a wedding or some other function where my presence is requested for November 4th or 5th, don't expect me to be there. Yesterday I successfully competed my 9th and final race for the 2006 ING New York City Marathon! No longer will I have to hope that I win the lottery. Instead of letting my luck run its course, I took matters into my own hands and completed the 9 necessary races!

Yesterday's race was 6.2 miles that I completed in 1 hour 28 seconds. That was my best mile pace which was 9 minutes 51 seconds per mile. Not super fast but remember I'm running with a bum knee and I'm 20 pounds overweight.

If you've got nothing to do next year on the 5th, then mark your calendar and come cheer Melissa & I on! She of course already qualified so we're like one big running happy family. Plus she's considering doing the Ride for the Roses with us if its in the Northeast as the LAF is promising!

That's all for now. I'll be posting periodically so you can track my progress, if you care!


Friday, December 09, 2005

For the Kids

As many of you may know I was once a big fan of the funny t-shirt. "Texas is For Lovers" "Getting Lucky in Kentucky" But Busted Tee's has out down themselves this time with shirts like the one here. Or this one:

Its almost impossible to not run out and get one of these shirts. But i don't think they'll go over to well in the office.

Check out busted tees for your shirt:

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

50 Cent Rapping at Some Girl's Bat Mitzvah!?

Ok I just found this on someone's blog and its Ok I just found this on someone's blog and its true...because everything I read on the internet is true. 50 Cent got paid to rap at some jewish girl's Bat Mitzvah! 50 Cent! A 16 year-old Jewish Girl! Some thing tells me that 50s new movie, video game and rap career aren't what they used to be if he's whoring himself out like this. Or maybe he just needs the money!

I guess I'll have to delete his music from my iPod and download them to a CD for my niece because pretty soon he'll be doing children's books.

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Only in Philadelphia

Only in Philadelphia do you hear about people running onto the field at Lincoln Financial during a game to spread the ashes of their dead mother. That's what happened on Sunday. Check out the link to ESPN.com for more details http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=2239860

Here's the thing that confuses me. Why!? Who does that? Did your mother say as her last dying wish that she wants to have her ashes spread across Lincoln Financial? I understand being a huge sports fan and devoting a lifetime to your favorite team (shit I'm a Phillies fan so I'm used to losing teams) but I'm not sure if I want my ashes spread across the field. Sure its a cool idea but its a bit freaky and not healthy for fans. I'm not big on going to watching a football game and being worried that some dead ladies remains are circulating through the air. Its bad enough I go to Giants Stadium where Jimmy Hoffa is buried.

Ok I guess if I really thought about it, having my ashes spread on the field would be cool. But Lincoln Financial? Come on. It could have been worse. They could have been spread on the turf at the Vet. At least on the grass surface it can seap into the ground.

Thank You Pat Gillick & The Philadelphia Phillies

Dear Pat Gillick - GM of the Philadelphia Phillies,

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for enabling me to forget abuot the 2006 season before it even starts. Your attempt to slowly dismantle a team one superstar from being successful is working out well. After being named the GM of the Phillies in October you sent me a personalized email (ok it was a mass email but I felt it had a personal touch) where you stated you would do everything in your power to keep Billy Wagner and build a championship team.

Boy did I take the bait, hook, line and sinker on that one. What you did was pull an Ed Wade and the same manuever every Phillies GM has done before you. "We're going to build a championship team. We've got money to spend!"

Yeah you've got so much money to spend what you did was send Jim Thome and a shit load of cash to the White Sox for Aaron Rowand - who isn't bad but he's no Brian Giles. Then you attempted to keep Billy Wagner but what you failed to do was you failed to get in front of Wagner before the competition did. Therefore, the Mets jumped in front of you. Minaya played the "we'll build a team around you" card. What did you do? NOTHING!

Like Ed Wade did with Curt Schilling and Scott Rolen you were quoted as saying you would do everything you could to keep Billy Wagner. Ed Wade said the same thing abuot both players. He also said that he would build teams around them and he did. He built the Cardinals around Rolen and helped build the Diamondbacks and Red Sox around Schilling.

With all of that I would like to thank you! Thank you for giving me the summer of 2006 back. Thank you for helping me to realize that 2005 was a fluke. Thank you for not encouraging me to go to your stadium 5 times next year to spend and average of $150 each trip - that equates to a cost savings of $750!

There is one thing that I do ask. Can you encourage the team to suck balls from the start of the season? I'd rather not have the dillusion that we have a chance come May, June, July, August or September like I had last season. If they can do that for me then I'd be inclined to come to the stadium at least twice.

Yours truly.

p.s. you'll be receiving a photo album of my little league years, my parents couldn't afford a camcorder in the 80s, please use this as my resume to fill the position of closer for your team. Unless Urbina somehow beats the attempted murder charges but I think the cards are stacked against him.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Happy Birthday Dad!

Today is November 22nd, 2005. To everyone else in the world that's the date. An oridinary and rainy Tuesday in November just before Thanksgiving. To me, it marks my Dad's 59th birthday. Or in better terms, what would have been his 59th birthday. Seven years, 10 months, and 16 days ago my father passed away. A moment that took me almost 5 years to come to terms with but still lingers in my mind daily.

Unlike other birthdays there won't be a card, a cake with candles or presents. If I were closer to home I could go visit the cemetary with flowers or do like my brother does and pour a shot of whiskey at his grave. Maybe I'll do that this weekend when I get down there. But instead I go through work with a smile on my face, joking with co-workers, putting together proposals for clients all knowing that deep down inside today SUCKS!

Inside it hurts. Inside I'd like for him to be here to celebrate with us but reality sets in. If my father were still with us today what kind of condition would he be in if he were still fighting cancer? Would be his old self, like he was before he got sick? or would be like he was in the final years? Either way he's my father and I would only love him more. But when looked at realistically, my father suffered. he suffered a long time fighting a disease that woudn't go away. He didn't fight alone, my Mom was there every step of the way. When he wanted to give up she kept fighting. Mom was the reason he lived and fought so long not medicine or doctors or anything else. It was her determination to make sure that the man she married and loved her whole life was given the best support.

How am I going to celebrate his birthday though? It depends. Usually I'll have a beer in his honor but today seems harder than all the others. No one seems to be around today. Melissa has been too busy, friends aren't around and work is calling. So its more stressful. I thought abuot him this morning at the gym. Said an Our Father before working out, wished him a happy birthday when I woke up. But tonight will be harder because the only thing around to distract me is the TV and a fridge full of beer.

Maybe it'll get easier as I get older, but i doubt it. When my kids won't know their grandfather and can't understand the man I speak about until they are much older. But that's years from now. All I can say is Happy Birthday Dad. Wish you were here but understand why you couldn't make it.

Monday, November 21, 2005

Sunday, November 13, 2005

5 Hours 8 Minutes!

Well Ladies and Gentleman it was a success! Melissa completed the 2005 ING New York City Marathon on Sunday November 6th in 5 Hours and 8 Minutes! It was great to see all of those weekends of training, getting up at 6 am to run 12, 14, 18, 20 miles was well worth it.

She saw my mom in Brooklyn at the 6 mile mark. We saw her for the first time just after the 16 mile marker. Which was great. We had signs to cheer her on and she was looking extremely happy. From there she made her way up 1st avenue into the Bronx. Then when we saw her again at the 25 mile marker it was a great feeling. Great for me. She may have been in the worst pain because of her knee but it was great to see her make it that far.

Her support group went from just me then to five with 2 other people across the street. From there we added four more people to bring our total group to 11. Making our way to 59th and Columbus Circle our group went to 16 when my brother, sister-in-law and Grace showed up along with Melissa's cousins.

The greatest part was seeing her at the 25th mile. Knowing that she was going to finish. At that point nothing was stopping her! 5 Hours, 8 minutes! Amazing! She motivated me to run next year, as long as my knee holds out. It was great to see it all pay off!

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Theo, Answer the Question!!

This afternoon between trips to client meetings here in Boston I tuned the radio to a local sports talk radio station. The Theo Epstein press conference was on announcing his departure as GM from the Boston Red Sox. Theo explained that he's not leaving because he's tired of baseball, it wasn't about the money, it wasn't because of a disagreement with the CEO, and it wasn't a power struggle.

Bob Ryan asked the tough question. "Theo it wasn't because of money, you're not burned out, its not a power struggle or a problem with the higher ups. What was it then?"

Theo's response: "Well Bob I just explained why. Next question."

Well Theo, you actually didn't say why you're quitting. Explain it to us. Seriously, I think your faithful fans and the people of Boston as well as baseball enthusiasts would like to know. Is it because you're gay? That's the only think that I can think of. You're pulling a Jim McGreevy who resigned as Jersey Governor. Then went on to explain why...because he's gay!

There's nothing wrong with it. Just come clean. If you're gay do you think this city will think less of you? You made moves to bring a world series to Boston. You helped improve the city around Fenway, according to the Boston radio people.

Any one else have a theory?

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

26.2 or Bust!

Hi Everyone,

Ok we just went over the course map and reviewed the "Cheering Strategies" from the NY Road Runners. Listed below are some of the best viewing and least crowded areas . These are going to be along 1st Ave between 59th and 86th street. If you are going to be in Brooklyn or somewhere else (Kathy and my mom) just let me know that exact spot, what side of the street you’re on and I’ll keep Melissa posted as she runs.

Option 1: 59th Street Bridge. Melissa estimates she will cross the 59th street bridge into NYC around 1:20 PM. This is one of the most popular spots to view becasue it is where the runners hit NYC for the first time! This marks mile 16.

For those who want to see her there, you can position yourself at 59th and 1st Ave . After she passes you, you can then cross back and make your way across to the park. You can position yourself by FAO Schwarz or the Time Warner Center and see her finish mile 25 or 26! ( the last .2 are finished in Central Park)

Option 2: Position yourself along 1st ave from 68th street to 96th Street. This marks miles 18-19. After she passes you there, you can turn around and head towards 5th avenue where you can see Melissa as she enters the park at mile 24. In order to see her before she enters into the park though you’ll need to be at 86th and 5th Avenue or higher. 86th is the last time she’ll be on the street until 2 miles later. So the higher up you go the better chance you’ll have of seeing her.

**Please note that if you choose this option you will need to be on the left hand side (when you look north) of 1st avenue. Because you won’t be able to run across 1st avenue while the marathon is in progress. Your best route to get there is to go up Lexington avenue until you’re situated. But this placement gives you the option of seeing her twice.

Option 3: Park yourself somewhere. Send me a text message or give me a call when you get settled to let me know what street you are on and from Melissa’s view what side of the street you’re on. Once I find out I’ll text her to let her know who to look for where.
You can also meet at Home of The Magdits’ and all go down from there. That part will have to organize separately as I my mind isn’t focusing on that part right now.

Melissa and Char are making signs this week, whether Char knows it or not. If you want a sign you can get it if you meet at the house Sunday morning or we can meet in the city that day and I’ll provide them to you.

My cell: 201-723-9854. you can call or text. I’ve signed up to receive alerts as to when Melissa hits the 10k mark (6.4 miles), 20k mark (12.8 miles), half marathon (13.1 miles) and the finish. As I receive those I can pass that information along.

At the Finish: There’s a new family reunion area on Central Park West, between West 71st Street and West 60th Street, allowing for a shorter walk for runners after the race. Family reunion is arranged alphabetically by last name, with A at West 71st Street and Z at West 60th Street. Its where you can meet Melissa after she completes the 26.2 miles!

Friday, October 28, 2005

What Are You Dressing As?

What are you dressing as for Halloween? Here's a custome that you'll most likely see at the Halloween Parade in the Village on Monday

Happy Halloween!


The hangover has officially set in. Last night involved a company happy hour in honor of someone's recent marriage and another's promotion. Afterward I met up with friends at Saloon. And that's when things got ugly. Upon arriving the JagerBombs started. Followed by a Jack and Coke that was very light on the coke. The bartender, a co-worker of my friends, had a heavy hand which was fine at the time but now...ouch! At some point we did a shot of tomato juice with something in it. What was in it? No idea. I fucking hate tomato juice. Even when i'm not drinking it makes me want to vomit. Include vodka or any other alcohol and it still does nothing for me.

I did the shot not knowing it was tomato juice. As soon as I drank it I went straight to the bathroom to ward off vomiting. Splashed water on my face for about 10 minutes. Hit the ATM because i needed a cab to get home. Then I went back to the bar and grabbed my coat and bags then exited stage right. Some how I got a cab, kept myself from vomiting, over tipped the cab driver and made it home. All by 11:30.

Some how I've faired better than Paul. The verdict is still out on whether he slept or not. According to Leslie she thinks he hasn't. His IMs this morning were classic. Good times to wake me out of my coma as I sat at my desk. We'll definitely have to do it again soon.

Paul, did you sleep last night?

Too Funny Not to Post

Here's an email I received from Paul. Pretty damn funny if you ask me. I've adjusted the email to look readable on this site. Sorry paul but the picture i found is too big for the blog to handle...

-----Original Message-----
From: [mailto:********]
Sent: Monday, October 24, 2005 9:50 AM
To: ******
Subject: ugh


It would be difficult for me to be any more miserable right now, I feel like the worst person ever. First, let me start by saying that I am truly truly sorry, and I hate myself for hurting you. Of all the people in the whole entire world, you were honestly the last person that I would ever want to wrong in any way. There is no excuse at all for anything that happened, so I won't even try other than to say all of us had WAY too much to drink, and I did a stupid thing. I can handle you being pissed at me, I absolutely deserve it, I can even handle the ugly words that were exchanged between us, what I can't handle is thinking that you see me as a different person. It is weird, I feel like I just went through a horrible break up or something. The world looked funny yesterday, I couldn't crack a smile if you paid me, there are songs I can't listen to, and I just ! feel beyond crushed. I don't know if you meant everything you said to me, and I am hoping that you didn't. I know that I was wrong on many levels, but I am also hoping that this is something that we can deal with.

I know it sounds totally crazy and stupid, but you have come to play such a significant role in my life, I can't imagine my days without you. It is totally strange and weird to say that, and you could say that my behavior didn't reflect that, and you would be correct. I hate feeling like you hate me, and I hate feeling like all of your friends think I am a terrible person, because I am not. I know there is nothing I can say or do to take back what happened, but I just want you to know that fighting with you was just about the worst thing I could have ever imagined. It was right up there with one of the ugliest nights of my life, and I would give anything in the world to rewind and fix it.

I am not sure if you will respond to this, part of me thinks that you won't. If not today, then maybe some other time. Also, thanks for getting my stuff together, although I think my sunglasses are still at your house, if you could keep your eyes peeled for them that would be great. I can't even focus or work today, I can't eat, I seriously feel like it was an ugly break up, and I am hoping against hopes that it was not that and you are not done with me. Please don't cut me off, I really don't think I can handle that.

I am so sorry.


Dear Elizabeth,

Thank you for your concern. I'll be sure to file it away under "L" for "Long-winded diatribes from drunken wh0res I couldn't care less about".

You did a stupid thing huh? No...doing long division and forgetting to carry the one is "a stupid thing"; Mixing in a red sock with a load of whites is "a stupid thing"; Bl0wing some guy in a bathroom for 45 minutes while I sit at the bar wondering if you're taking so long because you ate too much bran that morning isn't as much a "Stupid thing" as it is grounds for permanent removal from my social calendar.

To be honest, I'm not sure if it was more amusing that you went and degraded yourself in a public toilet not once but twice in a 2 hour span, or that you seemed to think that by saying "Well, I didn't F0ck him" somehow gave you a clean slate.

So forgive me if I couldn't care less if the world "looked funny" to you yesterday. Since your world revolves around blow dryers, golden retrievers, Prada Bags and Jelly Beans, I'm sure it must have been most unsettling to actually have to consider someone else's feelings for 24 hours straight. The good news for you is that my friends don't think you're a terrible person, they just think you're the average run of the mill cuum-guzzling blond who commands about as much respect as your average child p0rn collector. I could be wrong but, it's pretty hard to respect some B&T chick who comes out to spend the night at my place even though she's seeing someone else in New jersey and winds up tongue-bathing the ta1nt of anyone who decides 30 minutes of droning commentary on Colin Farrell's new haircut is worth putting up with for a hand j0b in the men's room. The good thing about being a guy is that when I eventually bump into the young lad who f1nger-blasted you on top of a towel dispenser last saturday, we'll have a shot and laugh our heads off about the time it happened.

By the way, for the amount of time you claim to spend in spin class you really must be doing something wrong to sport the thunder thighs you do. Watching you parade around my bedroom in a thong was a little like watching sea lions mate. Thought you might like to know.

PS. I BCC'd about 100 people on this email.

Talk to you never,

Monday, October 24, 2005

24 Ways Women are Like Fish...

As stated by Doogie Howser's new character.

1. Both attracted to shiny objects
2. More fun to catch while drinking
3. Neither travel well
4. There's others in the sea and/or bar
5. Three words: catch and release
6. Both travel in protective groups

7. Small bladders
8. The deeper you go, the scarier they get
9. Their weight largely determines their value
10. [EDITED: My lawyer has requested that I remove this one from the blog… hint: crabs!]
11. They get all ornery if you try to grab their tail
12. Bears will eat either of them

13. They’re cold blooded.
14. Sometimes I likes 'em wild, sometimes I likes 'em farm-raised
15. You must document great catches or no one will believe you -- video preferred
16. Easier to reel in if you let them wear themselves out first
17. Seen the movie Splash? Case closed
18. Neither can operate a vehicle
19. They both eat things
20. The harder they shake their tail, the farther they'll go in life
21. Scales are important to each of them
22. They never have to buy drinks
23. Umm… Eggs? Duh
24. Can hook either with a great line

Sunday, October 23, 2005

NYSC's New Ad

New York Sports Club just sent me an email. Apparently they know its time for me to go on a diet. They found this picture of me and superimposed this ladies head on it.

Ok I get the hint I'll stop just donating money to your gym and I'll show up...sometime in the remainder of 2005.

No Sunday Night Football

With no sunday night football tonight I've resorted to watching High School Football. Middletown South versus Wall. When I was in high school we played Wall so at least I know the two Jersey schools playing right now or at least know where one of them is located. But thanks to Hurricane Wilam the Miami game was moved to friday...or at least I think that was the sunday night game.

This is what my sunday night is like. No NFL but the world series does start in 7 minutes. This is rough...

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Podcasting from online marketer's point of view

Last week I downloaded my first podcasts. Not bad topics either: ESPN and BusinessWeek The Blog Elite. The blogs were basically webcasts put into just a simple audio format. Great for listening while on the bus or subway. But when I think about it from an online marketing standpoint, where's the value? You can see how many times it was downloaded, yes but that doesn't guarantee that its heard.

Sponsors generally receive a 15 second spot in the beginning of the podcast and a 15 second spot during or after that podcast.

I downloaded but didn't listen to the sponsors message. I had to replay it 2 or 3 times to really understand what was being said. In both podcasts the sponsor was Sun Microsystems. By sponsoring the ESPN podcast was their message lost with me the sports fan audience? In the BusinessWeek podcast the sponsor would have it the point but that's not a guarantee either.

Where's the value in sponsoring a podcast? Why would an agency or client want to sponsor a podcast? I think that its a passing fad. Its something that may be going away before most people even download 12 podcasts. The theory of a podcast is good, sponsoring that's where the question lies. Do I think those marketing dollars could be used for something more measurable online? Yes because that's the beauty of online advertising, its measurable. Up to the very minute measurable in most cases.

My degree isn't in marketing. I don't have an MBA in marketing but what I do have is the knowledge of a consumer. I think I've been doing this long enough to figure out what is a smart use of marketing money and what is a bad use.

Have you downloaded a podcast? If so did you ever pay attention to the ad in the beginning or at the end/ Is it something that would encourage you to go out and purchase a product? Is it something that builds your awareness?


Following up to my Apprentice post. They are creating a float to promote Zathura during a parade down 5th Avenue in NYC. Jennifer M. keeps mispronouncing the name of the movie. A problem which I foresee having her FIRED by THE DONALD.

The float that the guys created looks cool. Its got a good concept. The float that the girls created kicks ass but there's an overlying (underlying?) problem. The girls have made this huge float with a lot moving parts. Parts that are being moved manually but they aren't taking into consideration how its going to work when its actually moving. Favuer just made a similar point. But here's the link to the movie. Check it out because so far it looks pretty good.


More details to come but would you go see it?

Staring Down the Barrell of 30

110 days until 30! 30! I know you're just as shocked as I am...I can't believe i'm getting that old! Well after a drunken argument with Melissa who wants to do something special for my 30th I revealed something that I've been researching on my own. Life Insurance and Disability Insurance. Why?

I'm looking into these things because I'm getting old. Its reality. Some day I'll have a family who I'll need to provide for. A wife and kids who are going to need things in case something ever happens. Let's be realistic for a minute, not many males on the Carew side have lived past 60. The Bavoso side, that's a different story. Pop is going to be 89 in a month. 89! How great is that!

Like I said though, I need to be realistic. I do a lot of traveling. On and off planes. Traveling through NYC. Things are risky. Traveling is risky. Would I trade it in for anything? Hell no! But sometimes you need to make sure you're doing what you can to prepare for the future. While I haven't taken out a policy, I am being prepared. Smart.

Have you ever considered life insurance in your 20s?

The Apprentice

Its season 3 of The Apprentice. I'm hooked. Season after season I watch. Even now with Martha's Apprentice, I'm watching. As I blog, I'm watching the new episode of Donald's Apprentice. The original. The ladies team just took Randel from the men. That's HUGE! Why? Josh just made a great point as to why taking Randel from the men is a big deal "he knows our processes, our weaknesses."

They are now working creating a promotion for a new John Favuere film...not sure if that is how you spell his name.

Time to watch. More to come.

Do you watch The Apprentice? If not what do you watch?

Blog Traffic

September 29th was the date that the tracking feature was added to this blog. In almost a month there have been 68 visits to this blog. How many of those are from me? Not as many as you would think, the reason I go is yes to see how much traffic this is generating. By knowing how much traffic is coming to the blog I know that its being read. Whether its being read by my Mom, friends or random people who post comments to the blog promoting some stupid product they think you would want to read.

To me 68 visits, minus my 12 visits, is a success. Someone has found something to read. Do i need to blog more? Not necessarily. I only blog when i feel i need to. When there is something on my mind or something that just needs to be said.

When you do the math that's 56 visits in just under a month. That means that you've found something interesting so I'm going to post more and more. But as readers of the blog are you being short-changed? Is there something you, my valued reader, would like to read on this blog? Something that you would like to appear? Post a comment, let me know what it is. Until then I'll just keep writing about nothing.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

The Blogs I've Read Since Getting Home from Work

There's small war going on in the blogosphere. It all started with Stephanie Klein's Greek Tragedy. Her story was posted in the Sunday NY Times over there summer. After reading the article and her blog I was hooked on blogging...that's how I got my start.

Since then I've found other blogs through her's which have lead to more and more blogs which are and aren't related to hers. There are parodies of her blog like Tale of Two Sisters written by two college students, I think...i've read so much stuff lately that they are all blending into one another. For whatever the real reason is, the bloggers of Tale of Two Sisters have stopped blogging on that site and stopped their parody of SK. But when you look at the comments section of their final post "STFU" the battle is just beginning.

Followers/Fans of SK are attacking the Sisters while others have come to their defense then they've been attacked as well. (I'm not doing the story justice but I just cracked open a pint of Ben & Jerry's Magic Brownie and all the details are being washed away with every spoonful.) From there people have been labeled stalkers, others have posted under anonymous emails or blogs protecting Klien. People like Chris London have been attacked and labeled as a stalker. There's a history between London and Klein but with all of the comments being posted I'm lost on the details. (Half-way through the pint of Magic Brownie, this thing doesn't stand a chance.)

From there I've gone to other blogs such as Sex & Moxie and Mimi in NYC. Both sites offer different perspective on the blogosphere. Sex & Moxie is...well...just as you would assume based on the name. It has a sex appeal to it. Mimi's story is the story about a journalist working in a strip club to pass the time. She's done a lot of traveling, enter the counter illegal and writes about more than just working in a strip club. Its not as sexually graphic as Moxie...but its still something to read.

why post all of this information? Well it was really prompted by the arguing on the Sisters site. I think I spent about an hour reading the final posting and all the comments. That argument has been going on for 9 days. NINE! People get a life and stop posting so many comments.

My blog won't get picked up in any Google searches so I'm not too concerned with pissing these other bloggers off. Plus its not like I called them out on anything, dissed them or told them to GFY. I'm just posting this because its on my mind.

What other blogs do I read? Well the main ones are my friends' blogs. Those are listed along the right hand side of my site. Its something to kill the time and kind of stay up on what my friends and other bloggers are doing. Check them out. You'll learn what people are eating for lunch, what is going on in the life of Frantic Antics and what other people are doing.

What blogs do you read? Give me something else to read when I'm not at work, watching TV, blogging or reading one of the new books I bought.

P.S. The Ben & Jerry's didn't last more than 10 minutes. 1 Pint down! Maybe time to go out and buy another. Shit its raining again...i'm not going anywhere.

Scooter Here!

OK its game 2 of the National League Championship Series and that annoying Scooter clip is running. For those who don't know who Scooter is, its this computer generated graphic of a baseball used to instruct viewers what certain pitches are when the announcer refer to them. If you don't know what a 12 to 6 curve ball is do you really think that this stupid feature during the game is going to make that big of a difference in your baseball experience? Half the time people who are watching a game don't even realize its a 12 to 6 curve ball. Its a freaking curve ball who cares!

As a baseball fan I'd rather listen to the announcers drum on about how the Molina brothers are the best story in baseball right now. Or anything other than Scooter. We should start a petition to get rid of Scooter! Anyone with me?

Your thoughts?

Saturday, October 08, 2005

White Trash Moment

Its one of those Saturdays where its been raining since I woke at 7 am. Unable to fall back asleep I spent the morning playing Madden 2005 until about 11:30 am. Since then I've been sitting around the apartment watching college football. Now its 4:50 and I've cracked open my second beer. Here's where the white trash moment has come to my attention.

The Yankee game has been canceled. Beer number 2 is sitting on the coffee table and I am still in the same clothes since I woke up. Hair is still in the form of bed head because I've shifted from one end of the couch to the other. But what has really made this a white trash moment is that in sitting here I realized that the wife-beater I am wearing either shrunk or is now too small for my gut. I feel like one of those guys you see in a "re-enactment" from Cops. Fat dude sitting around in his wife-beater waiting for something to happen to him so he can catch his break. Ok Cops wasn't the best metaphor but its the closest I could thing of.

Does seeing myself in that lifgt encourage me to get up and run, bike or do some form of exercise? Yeah it gets my mind working but it doesn't get me off of the couch. I mean the most work I've done today is empty the dishwasher. Plus I think Noah just floated by on his Ark because its been raining since Friday morning.

What am I going to do? I'm going to sit here and watch more football, eat Doritos and wait until its time to go to bed. Its my weekend of leisure so why not. Plus Melissa is at home so its not like I'm ruining any of our plans for the weekend. Besides, its a 3 day weekend and I'm allowed to loaf around for a few days. Its what I do best.

Ok another episode of M*A*S*H is about to come on.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

New Features

In my wide awake state I've added some new features to the blog in order to keep it interesting. You'll see Google AdSense now appear on the site, feel free to click on it when you see something relevant to you. Another new feature is the Rapid Counter in order to see how much, ok how little traffic How Do You Like Me NOW!? is truly getting.

I'm an internet dork. Trackability is good. Generating revenue is even better. But if I want to make this thing work there needs to be things on the site to keep my loyal users happy. And by loyal users I'm referring to the 4 people who come to my site.

This isn't my full time job but it is something that is keeping my interest.

11.5 Year Reunion

Its midnight here at home. If you read my previous post you'll know I was in San Fran, which is where my sleep timer is still located. I know I need to go to bed because I have to get up early to go to work but sleep isn't happening. For one of the first times in my life I don't want to sleep. On the plane I took a quick power nap which was induced by a can of Miller Lite. Now, two beers later I'm wide awake.

And now that I'm wide awake there are a ton of things running through my mind.
- Is there something that I didn't do for work that I can be doing now?
- Shouldn't I be apartment/house hunting?
- Why are the Phillies still in the playoff hunt? They should have been eliminated months ago which now forces me to pay closer attention to the Phillies and Astros. That bothers me.
- Man am i glad I didn't go to my 11.5 year reunion.

That last point sticks out the most. Its been 11.5 years since I graduated from high school and instead of having a 10 year reunion like normal people we missed it. Someone organized the 11.5 year but I really didn't feel like going. All the people I want to see are people I still talk to. They are people I see at least twice per year. Should I have gone to hear what people are doing these days? Nope I shouldn't have. I can only assume that there were people who were making themselves out to be bigger than who they really are.

"I run my own company."
"I'm a CEO of a major corporation."
"Married. 3 Kids."

Personally, I don't give a shit. The people who I still talk to are successful in their own right. I don't need pointless babble like "So what have you done with yourself since graduating?" "My the last 11 years haven't been kind to you. What the fuck happened?" Bullshit...don't need it. The sales guy in me thought it was a good networking opportunity. But networking for what? Are these people going to be future clients of mine? Probably not. Are they going to sell me house? Nope, I don't like friends knowing my finances and something like having a high school acquaintence know how much or how little money I make isn't appealing.

But whatelse. Were there people who I wanted to see? Nope. Were there people who I wanted to rekindle friendships with? Maybe but if they were that important to rekindle then I would have made more of an effort. What ever happened to the people who won homecoming and prom king and queen? What did they make of themselves? Are they still the "elite people" they thought they were in high school? Who cares! What happened to the people who thought they were the shit in high school? I have an idea but I don't really give a shit what has happened to them.

Maybe it would have been good to go to see these people. Then I would have had the people with their yearbooks saying stupid things like "you guys were class couple, what happened?" What happened was the we grew up and apart and I found my life. I found where I wanted to go and who I wanted to go there with. Yeah she dumped me but who cares!? Not me. If I cared I would have made an effort but I didn't.

My life has brought me to many places. Its brought me a great family, a beautiful girlfriend who I have a future with and I'll make it work. I have great friends who, while we don't always see each other, we are friends and when we're together its like we never missed a beat.

But what has happened in the last 11.5 years? There's more than I can explain. Friends have come and gone. I've moved north and left that school behind. Why look like back? So I can feel some self gratification? So I can say "Ha this is where life brought me!" - that line would most likely be followed or supported with more bullshit.

Where will I be for the 20th? Who knows, who cares. Maybe in 8.5 years I'll have an interest to go to the 20 year reunion where I'll go backed with pictures of the wife and kids. My car, house, boat, office or cardboard box. But maybe I won't go to the reunion because I won't really care.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

The Comfort of Home

Traveling has taught me something, its taught me to miss home and love NYC that much more. I just returned from a business trip to San Francisco and while its a great city this trip was tainted by where I stayed. "Its like Times Square 20 years ago," is how it was explained to me. My hotel was at 8th and Market. Not knowing the city I figured that it was in a good location based on the pictures of the hotel and what it was near. Little did I know that it wasn't really near anything. Yes it was about 4 blocks from Union Square and all the shopping of San Fran but to walk out of there in the middle of the night was like taking your life in your hands.

On Tuesday I walked from Embarcadero to my hotel in a suit carrying a laptop bag. More like clutching my laptop bag. There were more bums in that eight block walk then there are bars in Hoboken, and Hoboken has the most bars per square mile than any place in the country. I'll admit it, i was nervous even slightly scared. But not enough to panic.

I walked with a purpose. Eyes forward and focused on my destination. I didn't look to the right or left but I did look behind me every so often. Even though it was broad daylight you never know whats going to happen. When I sensed a homeless person eyeing me for money I grabbed the cell phone making it look like I was talking to someone. Hoping that they wouldn't hit me up for money.

I'll give money to a homeless person. That's not a problem. Especially during the winter. But when you're walking a street where there's a homeless person every ten feet you just can't do it.

In my traveling I just couldn't wait to get home. The comfort of my apartment. The softness of my bed. The sight and touch of Melissa. It made me realize that while I don't mind traveling, I'm much more comfortable at home. I know what streets to walk and when. Where I can grab a drink. Basically just how to get around.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Nothing to read at the Book Store

Since starting my job three months ago, I've taken to journeying over to the Time Warner Center. At least twice a week I had over there to look at some clothes in the windows that I can't afford yet I keep telling myself that I need new clothes for work. Then I head up to the Samsung store on the 3rd floor and look at the cool phones that don't interest me. Or the laptops I can't afford either, if I couldn't afford the clothes there's no way I can afford the laptop.

In between looking at the clothes and going to Samsung I hit Borders. Every time I go in there's always one of two security guards at the door, a large black man or a large white man. Both always pretty cool as they say hello and goodbye to me. I'm sure that they recognize me coming in there at this point. Because the people at J. Crew and Samsung sure do remember me.

There I was today. Looking for a book to grab for my trip to and from San Fran. I wondered the store with no specific book or topic in mind. Just wandering. "Maybe I'll get a book on house buying tips or one on history," I thought to myself. Then I realized that i'm flying Song out to San Fran which means which ever book I have to pick up it will have to compete with the football games that will be on tv on the plain.

I was so determined to find a good book that I ended up in the kids section! Oh the Places You'll Go is something that could keep my interest. Nah...moving on...I kept wandering back to the the Best Seller section. Nothing...boring. Maybe a magazine.

I headed over to the magazines. Standing by the sports magazines and the men's health magazines of the world i reach for the GQ. Cameron Diaz is on the front, so why not. But then I realize that if i buy it I'll have to pay sales tax at Borders so maybe I'll just buy it at the newsstand across from my office. (Which i found out later isn't carrying the latest GQ with Cameron on the front.)

After finally leaving Borders, I had down to my lunch spot. Whole Foods of course. Reaching the supermarket of all supermarkets I had right over to where the seltzer is. Grab a bottle of citrus flavored seltzer and head for the lunch section. As I approach the area where the sushi, sandwiches and hot foods are, I see that the lines to pay are out of control. I reverse course. Put the seltzer back where I bought it, because nothing bothers me more than putting things back in a supermarket where they don't belong. Then I head for the escalator. Its been a very boring and eventful trip.

Walking out of the Time Warner Center I once again feel as though I have beat Capitalism by not spending any money in there. But then I feel as though its been a waste of time walking the 3 blocks to get there. Maybe tomorrow they'll have a new selection of books for me to dismiss for my trip. And hopefully the newsstand across the street gets the new GQ with Cameron Diaz in soon.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

September 11th

On Sunday September 11th 2005 I walked past the TV tuned to one of the local channels broadcasting people reciting the names of those who passed away four years ago. Today in my daily review of the blogs I opened up an old co-workers blog and began reading. Ted Villa and I worked together at Euro. On Sunday he posted blogs at the exact same times as each incident from 2001 - 8:46 am, 9:03 am, 10:05 am, 10:10 am and 10:28 am.

Nothing touched me more than his posting of an email he sent out to friends and loved ones on September 15th. Ted had shared some of his recounts of the incident with me after the attacks. We had different visual perspectives, his from a roof top in Brooklyn and mine from across the river in Hoboken.

Here is the URL to his site with the posting of the email. Its touching and definitely worth reading.


Wednesday, September 07, 2005

What Would You Do With $171 Million?

"What Would You Do With $171 Million?" she asked.
Without hesitation "Pay off my mom's house, your parent's house, Kevin & DJ's house, Frankie's house, your debt, my debt, give money to Ken because we've made that deal."
"Would you keep working though?"
"Yeah, I can't go without working. Shit I work two jobs now and I don't need to but I still do because i need to keep busy."
"Sigh, I'd probably work part-time and travel alot though."

Today I played the megamillions, its at $171 million so how could I not. I meant to play last week but I forgot to get my tickets. Luckily for me I had a second chance. People don't get second chances and I'm not expecting to win but its worth trying. You can't win the game unless you're playing.

Let's imagine for a while what would happen if I did win. Look at my response to Melissa above. Six of the 7 things I've listed above revolve around everyone else. To take the conversation further, I went on to tell her that I'd then sell my mom's house and buy her a new one allowing her to keep the profit from the sale of her house. I'd sell Kevin's house and do the same plus make sure Little Princess Grace doesn't have to worry about money ever! Yeah I'd get myself out of debt and I'd buy myself a house, car and other cool stuff but I'd keep working. Money is great. I like working to make money to buy the things that her and I want. But $171 million would definitely change someone.

Of course I'd take that in cash then spread it out where I needed it to be spread out. Lets just say I'd get $70 million in cash after taxes and Uncle Sam took any thing else he wanted. That wouldn't leave me with much. I could spend a million in a week just buying toys, such as a beach house, a sweet car, a boat and other fun stuff. But with buying houses and cars and boats comes insurance and taxes. If I owed multiple houses I'd pay multiple taxes. So if I kept working then I could use my paychecks to pay those taxes and insurance.

Most people would retire but maybe I'll keep working the two jobs just for shits and giggles.


The trip was planned. Five days, four nights. We were finally getting away from everything. Our first trip that wasn't business, family or wedding related. Labor Day weekend away from the barbecues, crowded beaches and bars of the Jersey shore or the Hamptons. Melissa planned the trip in the matter of 45 minutes. It basically started with an IM "I need to go on vacation." My response "Ok, lets go." Short and sweet, a man of many words, never in my life have I realized that I take after my father until I realize I'm not a talker...I'm not a talker.

A week before we were set to go away Hurricane Katrina unleashed mass destruction on the Gulf Coast. We were watching the reports in horror of what was going on with the people in the South. But in the back of our minds we were selfish thinking about the destruction in Cancun. Would the Hurricane make a turn for the worst for us? Yeah we were being selfish but when you hadn't had a vacation alone in the two plus years you've dated then you can be selfish. And just to easy anyone's comments about the hurricane, yes I've contributed money.

Two days before our trip to Cancun, rain for 10 days straight. And not just a 10% - 30% chance but a 60%-75% chance of rain. Thank God for travel insurance! We were able to recoup all the money we were going to spend to go to Cancun. Now it was time to decide where we should go instead.


I'd never been to Newport. Melissa hadn't been so lets go! Let's get to Newport. If you haven't been to Newport I recommend going. We did the drunken couple stumbling home. We did the nice dinners and a really nice lunch. The best time we had was sitting at Castle Hill having lunch. Castle Hill is right on the water. There outdoor dining and then there's a section where you can bring your drink down to the chairs over looking the water.

Due to the amount of people we weren't able to sit at the chairs to drink because once we finished our lunch, and what a lunch it was, we felt the need to go walk off the food in the tourist area.

The meals we had were by far well worth the cost. Melissa had scallops, I had pork tenderloin and we both had 3 drinks each. By far one of the best meals I've had in a long time. The pork literally fell apart as I cut it which is a good sign to me.

If you haven't been to Newport I recommend you go. Its a nice place to go in order to get away. There were a lot of people but when I looked around, the only person I saw was Melissa. It was just a good "rekindling" experience. Now we need to start planning our beach trip for the fall. Cancun again maybe? Possibly.

If any one of the five people who read this site can recommend some place nice for her and I go to away to in order to cut loose or just sit on the beach and drink a few frozen drinks please let me know.

I have pictures but that requires emailing them because they are on oFoto.com.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

The Fight Against Cancer

My uncle has cancer. My father passed away from cancer. A close friend of mine as well. My roommates mom. My cousin’s husband is a cancer survive. An old friend from work is a cancer survivor. Many more in my circle of family and friends that are just to vast to count or list have been affected by this disease.

2005 marks the first time in two years I’m not putting my body through the hell of a 100 mile bike ride to raise money to battle this terrible disease. Yet I feel the need to do something. Whether its donate money, send a card, an email or anything to show them that I care. My thoughts of them aren’t enough. My prayers, while may be powerful, don’t make me feel as though I’m doing anything to help.

But through all of this the people who I feel for are those of us who are the “support group.” Believe me I feel for the cancer patient, survivor and victim (for lack of a better word), but the task of the support group is extremely difficult. These people look at our loved ones on a daily basis and see how they change. They are set to the task of ensuring they do everything in their power to help their loved one but sometimes they feel as though it’s not enough. I know, because I’ve been there.

When my father was suffering from cancer and every thing else that came with it, my mom, brother, future sister-in-law, and I were tasked with doing everything that we could to help him. My brother and I often talk about how we had two different fathers in the same person. During my brother’s high school and most of college years my father was strong and healthy. During my high school and college years my father was sick, often too sick to get out of bed. He would go to my sporting events in a wheelchair because he couldn’t walk. It broke my heart. Actually it tore my heart out. But I didn’t love him any less. I love him more. He was and always will be my father and no one can replace him.

One day I’ll get married and my future father-in-law my let me call him “Dad” but I may decline out of respect for him and my father.

As I mentioned earlier, my uncle is battling cancer. The doctors told him, his treatment may take 6-8 weeks. He was hoping for 6 weeks but on Wednesday he started treatment week number 7. I can only imagine what my aunt and my cousin are going through these days. My uncle is and will always be strong but cancer and its treatment knocks the shit out of you. It makes you humble.

The last two years I’ve taken pride in putting cancer survivors and cancer victim’s names on my jersey to ride in their honor. While this year I am not doing the ride for financial, physical and personal reasons – I was hoping to get into the NYC 2005 Marathon so my training changed – I am supporting the fight against cancer in other ways. Through donations, reaching out to family and friends and by staying informed. All I ask of my family and friends who read this blog is to either make a small donation or more importantly call someone you know who is battling or battling cancer to let them know you’re thinking of them.

Friday, August 26, 2005

Wedding Crashers Trailer

For those of you who haven't seen the movie check out the new trailer starring Chris Da Player Reilly and Mike Da Pimp Plewick.



Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Look To The Cookie!

A black girl with big boobs to my left. Another girl dressed in business attire in front of her. A red-head standing behind me. What do these three women have in common with one another? They were all standing on line at Subway at 56th street waiting to pay along with me. Whatelse do they have in common? They were all offered a free cookie by the guy working at the register. Was I offered a free cookie? Nope. Why? Probably because I don't have boobs.

This isn't the first time its happened to me either. So don't go thinking that this is a one time event. No this has consistently happened every time I've been there to get lunch in the last month. I understand that bars sometimes only let groups of girls in and not groups of guys but this isn't a bar and it wasn't a social event. Its a matter of me doing my best to get fatter!

Now that I've been sexually discrimenated against I took matters into my own hands. Standing at the register after paying for my meal and hearing him offer a free cookie to the red-head I turned. Looked at the cookies like a criminal. Reached across this girl. Grabbed a White-Chocolate Chip Cookie and turned away from the counter.

Feeling as though I just beat the system I proceded to stuff the entire cookie into my mouth. They couldn't charge me for what they couldn't prove I had taken. With cookie crumbs in the corners of my lips, I walked out of Subway 150 calories heavier and a whole lot happier!

Tuesday, August 23, 2005


Its been a while since I last posted and that was because of some good advice from Chris Reetz. "You're trying too hard to be funny. Just relax and it'll happen." Or something like that. So I did. Then I went for a walk in the area around my office and here is what I saw:

Walking down 5th Avenue by Tiffany I spotted the most glorious site in the last few weeks. Coming towards me on roller blades was a 6 foot beauty with long lovely brown hair. Now the 6 foot estimate is 6 feet tall not on roller blades. She was approaching rapidly but luckily for me the light had changed so she was stuck on the other side of 55th Street.

When the light changed, the woman in front of her moved out of the way to reveal her in her full roller blading beauty. Her hair was long and brown, reaching slightly to her shoulders. But what was even more impressive was the fact that she was wearing skin tight white shorts and an orange bra.

How can you tell it was an orange bra, you ask? Very easily. As I was standing there she was rolling directly at me. I did my best not to stare but how could I not! Orange Bra! White Pants! And she was modelesque, if that’s even a word or the correct spelling. Her boobs were at eye level which made gazing at her boobs that much harder to avoid.

Unlike the black guy standing next to me, I refrained from making a comment. He on the other hand decided that it was his right to yell, “hey baby where you goin’ so fast! I’m right here!”

It reminded me of a Jimmy Buffett song called “Fruitcakes”. “I saw a guy/roller balding naked/ along the cross walk in the middle of the week.”

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

XXXClusive Writing Opportunity

For those of you in my Fantasy Football league, you have had the pleasure of reading some of the smut that I can churn out for the annual league manual. This has been some of the finest work ever written and published for your reading pleasure. While your wives, girlfriends and my girlfriend may be offended by it, the writing serves strictly as reading enjoyment. Plus its great to receive feedback from everyone. Feedback as: "Dude you're a sick fuck! where do you come up with this shit!" "How the!? Where the!? Who fucking writes like that!"

Hey its a talent. When you've got it, run with it.

Today during my daily review of WSJ.com, ESPN.com, and Gawker, I came across a post on Gawker where its pornographic counterpart is looking for writers. Check out this link: Live Girls on Stage!* As tempting as it sounds, I believe that my writing should be kept to the fantasy football league and maybe this blog. But by putting it on this blog it leaves open the opportunity for family and relatives to read, further tarnishing my image with them.

Seriously, how do you think my mom would feel about some of the things I have written!? Well none of it is from experience, just my screwed up mind, it is something that she would truly be offended by. This is the woman who brags to her friends that my friends and I ride 100 miles once a year to raise money for charity or shit like that. How would she look them in the eye and brag about me after reading so of my stories.

Either way, I wanted to put all the fears and concerns to sleep. I won't be quitting my day job to join Fleshbot as a porn writer. Tempting, i know. But somethings are best kept among friends. Plus if I write some cool shit, I could become published, quit my day job and live off of royalty checks.

Its good to dream. Now its time to get cracking on my next story for the fantasy football league.

Monday, August 15, 2005

CBGB Lives on with an Insiders Account

Many of you may have heard that CBGB was tangled in a legal battle of back rent. On August 10th, a Manahattan Civil Court judge ruled that the venue hadn't been "stiffing" its landlord on past rent and can't be evicted. This is a momuntemal ruling for the famous club as it has been around since 1973 located on Bowery Street.

While CBGB isn’t necessarily my speed it is good to know that places such as this aren’t being closed down because of greedy landlords. Or to make room for another Starbucks. The closest I’ve ever come to CBGB is being lost down on Bowery and walking past it. I’ll admit I was a bit spooked by the folks hanging outside of the club but they didn’t give me any problems so I felt a bit safer having to later ask them for directions to a bar. I was still new to the Village and had no clue how to get around below 24th street but the guys I asked were helpful, from what I recall.

My buddy Jason is into the hardcore scene that CBGB caters too. From the stories he’s told me, he’s traveled with punk bands and has performed with a quite a few others (I could be wrong on those points and Jason will correct me but that is just how I’ve interpreted conversations). On Sunday, Jason was at CBGB once again to watch a band that he had become friendly with years ago. It had been 15 years since the band Gorilla Biscuits last played together. His recount of the show provided me with great insight into scene in the club and the friendships that it has rekindled. Take a look at his recount from Sunday night’s fun.


Whether or not you've been to CGBG or if the music is/isn't your style, as a New Yorker you have to be happy with decisions such as the judge's to not force CBGB to pay the past rent. For those of you who don't want to click the link to read more, the jist of it is that the landlord increased the rent without written documentation. CBGB fought the landlord who was trying to regain the past funds and subsequently shut the club down. In the end, the historic CBGB won and continues to promote music throughout NYC.

Friday, August 12, 2005

Kitten Cannon


Sedaris & The New Animal Orgy

Today has been a rather slow day so during lunch I grabbed the latest GQ. I've read everything else from Fortune to SportsIllustrated, Wall Street Journal to the Metro free newspaper. While reading the magazine yesterday I came across an essay written by David Sedaris.

Sedaris has written quite a few books over the last year or so. One that I recently read, Me Talk Pretty One Day, was a relatively quick and easy read. It talks about his life growing up and some of places he's been and what he's experienced. After reading an article in GQ about Julio Franco, the 47 year old baseball player who is doing better than some superstars right now, I came across the essay from Sedaris.

Like his book its a rather quick read but it was pretty funny. What he basically did was take a day in his life and write it up for GQ. He basically blogged his essay. Its something I would and have done, like Short Skirts & a Gust of Wind. If you haven't read anything from David Sedaris take the time to read this little exerpt from the GQ essay. Its only about 1/3 of the essay but its pretty damn funny. If you read Me Talk Pretty One Day you'll be able to appreciate how twisted his sister is.


Cameron-Beltran Collision

This is definitely worth watching. While I hate the Mets, this is just rough. Cameron obviously takes the brunt of this face-to-face collision but its amazing that Beltran can actually walk after this. I guess that's why they pay him $42 million a year.

The link will take you to the story but check out the video that accompanies it.


The Aristocrats

The website dubs it as the private joke between comedians. Its "never been told in public" and gives us a glimpse into over 100 comedians. The film opened a few weeks ago in select cities and was discussed in the Sunday NY Times the week prior to its launch. If you look at the cast of characters, if you can even call them a cast, you'll names such as: George Carlin, Drew Carey, Andy Dick, Eddie Izzard, Jackie The Joke Man, Chris Rock, Rita Rudner, and Sarah Silverman.

People who are thankfully missing from the full list are Will Farrell, Owen Wilson, Vince Vaughn and Luke Wilson. While all four have been good in their movies recently, i'm getting tired of the 21st Century version of the Rat Pack. Plus I highly doubt any of those four have ever done stand-up.

Either way, it looks like its worth checking out. Here's the link to the site. Check out the trailer. Good times, lots of laughs.


Thursday, August 11, 2005

Award Ceremony

Here is a picture of Paul after winning the government science award just last week.


How Do You Like Me NOW!? Is officially a success! After 3 weeks of being live we have generated an enormous response! While this post isn't as successful as some of those big corporate sponsored blogs like ChasNote.com (cnet folks are big fans of that site) or Gawker.com, we are measuring success of this site based on the people visiting. Its always great to receive messages from Lance Armstrong and Omar Minaya, the true success of this site is being measured in the comments from people like Bill Hancock!

Many of you don't know Bill but he was the mathematical mastermind behind the success of Euro RSCG. Since Bill's departure from the agency it has lost numerous major accounts and excellent staff. Bill's departure was rumored to have been due to a layoff but for those of us who worked at Euro we know his departure was due to none other than Paul Magyar.

See it all started when Bill would come around to "clarify insertion orders" Paul. That right there should tell you something was wrong. Often times we found Bill standing at the entrance to our office gazing lovingly at Paul. You could see that his mind was traveling to wonderous places with Paul, all while they were running through fields of daisies.

When Paul decided he was going to move to Boston, long before he told Leslie or myself, he approached Bill in quiet comfort. They would sit for hours in Bill's office with the door closed and a Do Not Disturb sign hanging on the doorknob. But this time it was different. Paul broke the news. Bill lashed out in such a manner that the frightened Paul had to run away. He couldn't stand the heartache he caused. Paul ran to Leslie's office to tell her that he was leaving, Bill in a violent fit of lovers rage burst into Leslie's office. She did what she thought was best and told Bill that it was time for him to go. "The dream is over Bill. I'm sorry."

Rumor has it that Bill eventually forgave Paul. He traveled to Boston with him and helped him move. Since those glorious days 2 years ago, their love has died like a weed in the desert being scorched by the sun.

Today Paul is back in NYC and Bill is using this blog to reconnect. This my friends is how you judge success, by bringing two old "friends" together.

Tomorrow - The moving conversations of Paul Herrmann and my dog.


I'm beginning to think that the iPod is the worst thing I could have ever bought. Because it was in my laptop bag the iPod battery got somewhere near the laptop battery wiping out 70% of my music. This would be ok if the music that it wiped out was the same music that is on my laptop or on my computer at home. But NO. this is the music that i purchased or "borrowed" from other people! Fucking Steve Jobs and his fucking iPod invention.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

The Crash

The memory is etched in my mind. It’s a story that I share with people when they ask about riding or is I ever crashed. Reflecting on what could have happened. What would my life have been if circumstances were different?

The exact date and day escape me but the time is still something that lingers in my mind. It was 6:00 am on a warm summer morning, 30 minutes after I woke. It was still my first week on the new bike, a Trek Performance Pro 1000. Blue, white and black. The type of racing bike the pros ride, hence the name. It was built for street riding and even racing if I had been in the right form to do so.

I was cruising down Madison Ave in Hoboken at a sweet clip. The odometer on my bike registered 18 mph. I hadn’t gone a full mile yet and I was already at a nice cruising speed. As I crossed 10th Street and Madison I heard a car coming behind me. There was a car traveling down the opposite side of the street. Approaching railroad tracks I tried moving towards my left to avoid the tracks and give myself some room but the car to my left had a different idea.

He wasn’t moving in accordance with me. He wasn’t giving me the extra room I needed basically because he was out of room himself with a car coming towards him. I looked left to see if there was room, there wasn’t. I tried moving slightly but that wasn’t happening. My head turned to focus back on the road.

The next thing I saw was the telephone pole. In an instant I felt my bike not moving in the direction my body was moving. Momentum carried me right, the pothole my tire was caught in was forcing the front wheel left. My body had left the bike. Still moving at 18 MPH, at the least, my body flew. Head first into the telephone pole, I struck the pole in an instant.

The only thing separating my head from the pole was the plastic Gyro Helmet secured to my head by two nylon belts. The sound of plastic on solid wood echoes in my nightmares. The sound comes back to me at random times. It wasn’t the sound of a slap but more the sound of a crash.

The right side of my head hit the pole. Later I would see the dent in the helmet and the crack that the force of the blow administered. People often say when the hit their head they see stars. I saw the entire Solar System. Stars, planets, moons, and then literally the sun as I rolled over.

My hands tremble now as I right this. My head and shoulders throb. I can still see it. I can still feel it. I have a picture proving some of the damage inflicted on my body.

As my head moved to the left from the force of the blow I heard another CRACK. My right shoulder connected with the telephone pole. Just as hard as my head hit, my shoulder hit as well. My shoulder stopped me from flying further onto the sidewalk. The force of the collision had also turned my body so that when I finally landed my ass hit the curb. Square on the curb!

I was unconscious but only for a moment. The accident forced me to blackout just for a minute. I knew that the car traveling alongside of me never stopped. After coming to, I crawled to me feet. Still seeing stars but now feeling lost. I was dizzy and disoriented. Lost on the same road only blocks from my apartment. I stumbled to my bike. Clicked off my helmet and felt the urge to vomit. It didn’t happen. I dry heaved multiple times. Still lost but knew I needed to get my bike. I stumbled further into the street and looked back at the pole. I flew at least 4 feet.

Finally I took off my helmet, leaned forward and tried puking again but nothing happened. The helmet dropped to the ground. I collapsed to my knees. I could see it now. The crack was at least 2 inches long and the dent was the size of a softball.

I climbed on the bike and tried to pedal. My first thought was to get back on the bike. Ride. Get your head clear. My legs were gone. I couldn’t pedal. I couldn’t move. I climbed off the bike. Picked up my helmet and grabbed a water bottle off of the bike.

After a few minutes of trying to regain myself I walked the bike back home. Arrived at my apartment and sat on the couch. I couldn’t carry the bike up any more stairs so I waited. Went into the bathroom to look at my head. My pupils were wide open. I couldn’t see the green of my eyes. Just black pupils and bloodshot white.

“Advil” I thought. Popped two advil. Walked upstairs and showered. Put on clothes and went downstairs to watch TV with ice on my head, hip and shoulder.

“Don’t fall asleep. If you have a concussion you could fall into a coma.” I told myself. So I sat there. Watching TV.

What to Drink?

I'm already planning my evening of drinking. What should I drink? Beer? We have that in the apartment. Wine? We have that in the apartment as well. Jack? We have Jack and Coke so that's a step in the right direction. It'll probably be a game time decision. "Game Time" starts after I take The Diesel for a walk because walking a one-eared German Shepard is hard enough without a drink in my hand.

This is what my day has turned into. Not going to get lunch or make calls...What to drink tonight!? Luckily it was a busy morning so I can get away with that thought.

p.s. the picture was taken with my camera phone. so its shitty.

Officially Moved In

Its official kids, I'm staying at my job for a long time. My picture of Jimmy Superfly Snuka is up on my cabinet for all to see. When i first arrived here it was placed on the wall and hidden from view. For fucks' sake I'm at a new company where I don't know a soul but now i'm comfortable here. Superfly goes up in a prominent spot for the whole world to see.

I bought this picture when I was on vacation in Wildwood when I was probably in kindergarten. Its traveled with me from my house growing up to my dorms and apartment at Monmouth to every job I've had. Every job being Rapp Collins, Miller Business Communications, Fuel NA (which then became Euro, then Circle, then Euro Circle, then who know what the fuck after that), T-3, CNET and now CFO.com. Yeah i've had a lot of jobs....so what!?

I'm here! planted. comfortable. Home!

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

How Pregnancy Happens

I stole this video clip from Chris Diclerico. This is how Pregnancy Happens.


Stupid Mets Fans

We all know one. At times we want to kick them in the nuts. 2005 Mets fans have got to be the most annoying people on the face of the earth. Out of the 200 or so who I've met, only 3 are intelligent. Met fans have become more annoying than Yankee fans. At least with the Yankees they win championships, they know how to suck early in the season only to be in the penant race this season when it matters most. But mainly this post is directed at Tromba.

Lets look at your "new" Mets shall we. You've already lost one bet to me - if the mets finished the month of April above .500 I bought you a burriot but if they finished that month at .500 or below you bought me a burrito. I won. May, the Mets finished below .500, June same story. It wasn't until July when they actually finished 1 game over .500. But that month is still in question because it was shortened by the All-Star Break. Had they played games during those three weeks they would have finished below .500. You're "Cy-Young" pitcher was too much of a pussy to pitch in the All-Star breaking. Fucking asshole wants to preserve his arm for the playoffs. Way to screw over your fans who voted you in. Ok the fans didn't vote but still Pedro's an asshole.

Now you send me a text message that "The Mets could be the best team in baseball." Keyword = could. They could be but they aren't. They maybe on a 3 game winning streak, and winners of 5 of their last 10 games but buddy don't go getting a hard-on over something that isn't going to amount to a load of shit.

Please refer to a comment I made to you back before the season started. There's a team called the Atlanta Braves who are beginning to run away with the National League East. The rest of that division is just going to be fighting for positioning while surprisingly Houston has made a huge push for the Wild Card.

Great job on getting Pedro and Beltran. Pedro has paid off...there's no denying that. But Beltran? Seriously! I can put up better numbers than he is doing. And now comes your turn to comment on the waste that is Jim Thome.....Just remember, we're 4 games over .500 without him. You're only 3 with Beltran in the line-up. Thus proving that we are a better team.

So take your "new" mets and all the stupid ads across the beautiful city of mine and bring them back to the shithole known as Shea. The mets have been and forever will be a second class team in NYC.

If you read something, say something

People, People! I know there have been a few of you who have read my blog. While cheesy and without much behind it I write anyway. But if you read something, comment. Let's hear it! Let's start the dialogue before I become popular from writing about nothing. When that happens you'll be able to tell your friends that we know each other...and have proof!

Story ideas are always welcomed too. If you have a topic and want my to write about it. I'll do so.

Dunkin Donuts!

Around this time last year I was on the no-carb, low-carb diet bullshit. It was good. I lost the gut that I had been working so hard developing but I couldn't eat what I wanted. No pasta, no caffienated coffee and no doughnuts! NONE! Zero. ZIP. Ziltch! Shit i spent every morning for almost three years walking past either a Dunkin Donuts or Chelsea's very own The Donut Pub. I lived on Boston Creme and Chocolate Glazed with a large cup of coffee with milk and sugar. Through all of this I was getting fat. it wasn't too noticeable during the late summer because I was training for the Lance Armstrong Foundation 100 Miler. but it did slow me down, not that I need much help in being slow.

When I got to CNET Dunkin Donuts was right across the street. Melissa and I would meet to grab coffee in the morning. I'd go with Mike or Reetz or Latoria or anyone else who sat near me to get donuts and coffee. Or just coffee. I could feel myself getting fatter. I had a hard time walking up steps. I became the guy from Super Size Me and yes I was also eating McDonalds every so often.

Then one morning I got on the scale, stole it out of Ken's bathroom and weighed myself. 199 pounds. The fattest I ever was. Not just heavy, but fat. "Shit! what the fuck!" Ok so from that point on I went on Sount Beach. Lost a lot of weight because I wasn't eating the things i loved. Believe me it was hard to go into Dunkin Donuts and order decaf with skim milk and 2 splenda. Who orders decaf at Dunking Donuts? That's like going to McDonalds and ordering a salad. What the fuck are you trying to cover up and what the fuck are you doing!? Get a coffee!

But i stayed the course. Lost the weight. Worked out and started feeling better. Its a cyclical thing. I do it this time every year.

This morning I was on the bus. Determined to eat better and get in shape. I was going to get off the bus and get an apple or banana or some sort of fruit. Fruit! For me! I don't eat fruit. But i was determined.

Leaving Port Authority I said to myself "Hey fatty start walking. Its only 15 blocks up and 3 blocks over to the office." So I walked. Up 8th Ave to 44th. Up 44th and cut the some alley between to theaters. Then cut through the Marriott Marique reaching Times Square. I approached 50th and 7th then remembered that just the other day my roommate Kelly and I found the Dunkin Donuts at 50th. Today I got to 50th determined to keep walking.

And keep walking i did!!! Straight onto the line at Dunkin Donuts.

"Next PLEASE" shouted the woman.

"Medium Iced Coffee. Milk. Sugar. Boston Creme and Double Chocolate Glazed."

Maybe the diet will start at lunch time. Until then I'll sit here in my fattness and enjoy the fact that I just ate more calories in 5 minutes than I should all day. But hey I still walked to work. That's gotta count for something.

p.s. Haven't had McDonalds in over a year now and I don't miss it!

Monday, August 08, 2005

Lime Green to be Exact

Earlier I met my old co-workers for a few beers. Just one then I gotta go. Ok it turned into 3, i think, but I really had the intention of stopping after one...maybe two. After saying goodbye and heading back towards the PATH it started to drizzle. Nothing major just a few drops here and there. As I approached the PATH I realized, "Oh shit i gotta pee...ok its not bad I can make it home."

I got on the PATH at 33rd, grabbed my seat, sat down and pulled my hat down low so I could sleep. People were getting on after their long day of work, some slightly wetter than others from the rain. There I sat in a with some dude scruntched up against me rubbing and bothering the shit out of me. I didn't pay it too much mind because I've had a few beers so its not a big deal. Maybe I'm imaging it. Although the dude next to me did get on at 14th street so there is a little bit of concern for me.

The train reached Hoboken. Everyone got up except for the guy next to me who sat slightly longer than he should have. I was waiting for him to put his hand on my knee to push himself up. That's how long he sat there. I got uncomfortable. I made the move to get up and so did he. I sat back down because I wasn't going to give this guy a chance to check out my ass. Its a thing of beauty...or so I like to think :)

The dude next to me got up. He went for the door to my left. I went for the closed door straight across from me because the last thing I wanted him to do was check out my ass as I walked up the steps out of the station. He was slightly to my left, heading out the door. The door infront of me opened, I jumped and headed straight for the door.

Usually when people go up the steps of the subway or the PATH they walk directly behind the person infront of them. I made sure I walked quick enough for this dude not to get near me. Giving a glance back as I got onto the platform I saw the dude behind me. My pace quickened. I may have knocked over a woman with a baby stroller but I didn't care. I didn't want to be the victim of one of those awkward stares. Instead I was the person giving the awkward stare.

She was right infront of me as we walked up the steps holding the hand of her boyfriend. I tried not to be rude and stare but its virtually impossible when the girl walking in front of you is wearing see-through white pants with a green thong. Lime green to be exact.

I wasn't being perverted. I wasn't taking out the camera phone to take a picture to share with my friends. I was trying to get home. Forgetting the urge to pee. Trying to get up the steps and away from the stetchy gay guy...he may not have been gay but he's got the label already. (On a side note, I have no problem with gay people. I just have a problem with gay men hitting on me because its been known to happen. It can be quite unnerving.)

She was walking up the steps holding her boyfriend's hand, taking her time going up each step. It was quite annoying and I would have pushed a bit to get up the steps if it wasn't for the fact that I was basically getting a free show from this girl. I didn't have to strain. I didn't have to go out of my way to see it. There was nothing rude about it because when I looked to my right the girl next to me was looking at it as well.

"How does her boyfriend let her out of the house like that!" I thought to myself. "Shit how does she look in the mirror knowing she's wearing a lime green thong with see-through pants and think that no one will notice!" I was shocked. Not upset because it was something different to look at.

Usually its my luck to have a girl's skirt pop up in front of me. This time it was right there for the entire world to see. I wondered if she went to work like that today. If so didn't one of her female co-workers say something about it? Shit when I worked at Euro one of the girls I worked with had her thong sticking out of her pants as clear as day. She realized that we, the guys, noticed. Probably because people who had no reason to come near our desks were walking by saying hello to her. She realized what was going on, went into the bathroom and took the thong off so that people wouldn't see it. Yes I kept on staring after she took it off to figure out if she did or didn't. I thought maybe she just tucked it lower. She later told me that she went into the bathroom and took it off.

Today this girl walked without a care in the world that her lime green thong was out there for the world to see. Sometimes I just don't get it.

p.s. it wasn't a small thong either. it was one of those Monica Lewinski big thongs.

Past Co-Workers

Earlier I went out for drinks with my old co-workers. Having left CNET over two weeks ago I have had the pleasure of keeping in touch with my former co-workers via email and persistent emails from all of us. Mainly the emails are between Kevin Y., Reetz and Tromba and they consist of shit talking about one another's baseball team and links from NJGuido.com. There have been other group emails that I have been on and replied all so that everyone has my email to keep in touch with me. But after leaving today I realized that I miss the big companies that I have been accustomed to working at.

CNET was big but I knew everyone and its because we were all the same age. We did the same thing for work and had interests and hobbies that we can all share. It made it easy to come into work and be able to hold a conversation about sports, weekends, drinking and the person who showed up to work wearing the same clothes from yesterday. After having a few drinks with everyone tonight I realized that they are true friends. I've worked at a number of places and I realized the people who I am truly friends with. From Euro I know I'm friends with Paul, Leslie and Seth but I have other people who we can just pick up our conversations from wherever we left off the last time we spoke. But those 3 are people who I speak with on a fairly regular basis. Paul and I probably IM at least 3 times per week. Leslie, she's busy but we can easily bullshit with one another and Seth, the conversations with Seth while rare lately come very easy.

Its been great having friends like all of them and the people at CNET. I realize it not that these weren't just co-workers they were friends. The guys at all the companies enjoyed the random stories that I would share about some of the weird shit I'd see walking through NYC or the odd things that happened at the bar I work. For the ladies we were able to just talk and it didn't have to be about anything specific. usually it was all joking around stuff. This holds true for the CNET people and the Euro (T-3) people.

After 1 month of being gone from CNET, I realize at CFO.com things are slightly different. The people are nice and they are fun but there aren't that many of us. The group at CFO who are my age are a very small group. Most of the people are ones who have worked for CFO Mag for years. They are older than I. I enjoy the fun none the less but I do miss the big companies.

Down at the Bayou

Friday felt like a good day to slide out of work a little early to get a headstart on the weekend. After my boss told me that I could leave early I had my heart set on grabbing Melissa and jumping on the train back to her house in hopes of cracking open a beer. Seeing her for the first time in over a week definitely brought a smile to my face. We caught up with one another at the clock in the middle of Grand Central. Embraced with a huge hug and kiss that reminded me of when we first started dating.

Feeling so tiny in my arms I couldn't stop squeezing and kissing. Kissing and squeezing. It really felt like we had just started dating all over again. The feeling where all you want to do is hold your partners hand or have some sort of constant contact with that person. That's where we were at in the day and the week.

The days leading up to Friday had been stressful for her. As a matter of fact, the weeks leading up to this moment had been stressful for her. Often times her mind was focused deep on work. There has been so much going on for her that often times the conversation goes back to work, which I can admit now, would get on my nerves. I would think to myself "its saturday, can we not discuss work!" But there is a need to be understanding of what is going on with her at work. There's a need to remember a few years ago when we first started dating that I was in her place. Working 10 hours days, going home then checking email. Or being too nervous to take a few days off because something may go wrong while I was out.

Today felt different. Today felt like it was going to be different. I knew our train ride would focus on some work stuff. Its inevitable no matter who you are to discuss work with your loved one for the first hour or so that you see them after working 8 hours straight. You need that sounding boar. You need that person to hear you complain about work.

After the long hello filled with one big hug and multiple kisses we made our way down to track 110. Fifteen minutes until the train leaves. I thought about grabbing a beer for the ride but reconsidered because I really didn't want one. Shit did I just say that!? I didn't want a beer! She must have had some sort of hold on my today to walk right past the beer cart without a second thought.

Sitting on the train we discussed our days and how things were going. Earlier we had booked a nice romantic getaway to Cancun over the Labor Day weekend. She needed the break from work and I needed to sit some where not along the East Coast to relax. The trip had been planned and paid for earlier that day and that was all we discussed...after the little work conversation. We had found something to look forward to all week! The trip is less than a month away but there is so much to do. So much to plan for.

Arriving at her home it was time to make dinner plans. Sitting in her room she handed me the Westchester Magazine with a section devoted to all the places in the area. We were going out to eat and that part was decided long before arriving home.

Flipping through the pages I hadn't really found anything of great interest. Although I hadn't really looked that closely at all of the restaurants. Flipping the magazine closed a headline on the cover caught my eye - Barbecue. Hmm I could really go for some barbecue right now!

"Hey how about barbecue? Are there any good barbecue places that are near by?" I asked excitedly.

"We could go to the Bayou," she replied.

"Hhhmmm. The Bayou," I thought "that sounds interesting."

"Sold," I explained.

We're off to the Bayou! Cajun food in the middle of Mount Vernon. That right there sounded out to me but shit I was in! I wanted barbecue ribs and beer! I wanted to lick the barbecue sauce off my fingers and leave them smelling like the yummy bbq saucy that is applied to ribs.

The Bayou didn't disappoint! It boosts a relatively small bar that is separated by four booth style seats. Outside of the boothes the remainder of the dining area is made up of about twelve tables seating from 2 - 4 people at each table.

The menu was enormous ranging from Hushpuppies to Po'Boys, Ribs, Jumbalya, Gator Sausage and so much more yummy cajun, bbq goodness. We didn't know where to begin to order, the exception of the Rolling Rock I ordered. Beer. NOW!

Our waiter, some alternative looking dude with a piercing in his tongue and lip along with his spiked hair wearing army fatigues returned with our drinks, returned with our drinks - Rolling Rock and i have no idea what Melissa ordered. "I'll give you guys a few minutes," he said.

After reviewing the menu we almost came to our traditional compromise, Melissa was torn between two dishes and I was willing to order one in case she didn't like the other. In the back of my mind I really wanted ribs and I was hoping that we could change our compromise. Ten minutes later we are still discussing the menu when its decided, I'm getting the ribs but I have no idea what she ordered.

But first, an order of Hushpuppies! Our waiter returns with our house salads and the order of hushpuppies. "Hey can I get another, please" referring to another beer. The first Rolling Rock went down so smooth and refreshing that I needed another to make sure to keep my mouth wet.

The hushpuppies didn't stand a chance. We devoured them in a matter of seconds. Beer #2 went as quickly as the beer #1 and the hushpuppies. Out comes our order. I can see the steam coming off the ribs. The aroma of barbecue sauce waffed through my nostrils and was so powerful my mouth began to water. "Oh look at this," I thought to myself. "Oh and mashe potatoes!!!!" Although they referred to them as "smashed potatoes" but I didn't care. They were smoothered in gravy and I couldn't wait to dig in!

We picked at my ribs and my potatoes and some spinach like substance as if we were vultures having not eaten in days. Melissa and I tried her meal but were more content with the meal infront of me. Ribs! YUMMY! With each rib that I picked up, each bite resulted in all of the meat falling from the bone and dangling from my mouth. The simile of the vulture held true as I ate my meal, food hanging from my beak with my eyes darting around the room to make sure no one was going to take my meal from me.

Beer #3 arrived minutes after the first of 8 ribs were devoured. My fingers covered in barbecue sauce would have made picking the pint up exteremyl difficult so I sucked the barbecue sauce from my fingers. Savoring the delight of the ribs even further. Licking the sauce as if I were licking and ice cream cone. With my fingers finally clean of the barbecue sauce I took a sip of the ice cold beer. AAHHHH This is a great summer time meal! Second to only clams and corona.

Prior to dinner we decided to make a "southern night" out of it. We would head to the Bayou then go check out Jessica Simpson in a bikini. I mean "The Dukes of Hazard". But dinner was quickly adjusting those plans. Our stomachs full we drove back to melissa's house as we had over an hour and an half to kill before the movie. That move changed the outcome of the rest of the night.

Arriving back at her house, we knew we had to get up early saturday morning for Melissa's marathon training run in Central Park. Not one to screw with her training, we decided to throw on our pjs and just stay at home. Our full bellies kept us from doing much. We opted for sitting on the couch to relax. Hoping that the fullness would soon pass but that dream never became a reality.

After lounging for what felt like forever but really only resulted in 20 minutes, we decided that it was best if we went for a walk around the neighborhood. It wasn't quite 10 pm but if we wanted to sleep somewhat comfortably, then a walk would help us digest.
The ribs and potatoes were gone in no time.

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